No prep is needed for anal stretching other than having a normal bowel movement. Setting the stage for success includes a positive mood and mindset, as well as your surroundings. Dr. Goldstein usually recommend doing your exercises in the shower, while warm or hot water is running or right before a shower, both of which can help aid in relaxation. Be sure to have all of your supplies ready before you get started and remember that this includes lots of lube (this is paramount).

There aren’t any specific positions that work best for anal stretching and training. What’s more important is what feels comfortable for you. Understanding your anatomy, with all its internal angles and curves, sets the stage for successful dilating and play.

You’ll want direct, straight-in access, paying attention to your sphincter muscles upon entry. This means that it may be best lying on your back or on all fours and using a repetitive motion, going in-and-out, until you hit resistance. This controlled pressure, with continued gaping, will allow for the relaxation we need that will assist in anal stretching. You may need a bit of trial and error to see what feels right. I also encourage you to switch things up because we want to simulate future play as best we can and sometimes that takes on a mind of its own–or many different positions.

Unfortunately, anal stretching is not permanent and anal training is a continuous process. You should make these exercises a weekly ritual. You have two options: engaging in anal sex or playing with butt plugs or dilators 2-3 times a week to dilate. As you get more advanced, you should be using your butt plugs or anal dilators for both stretching and tightening the dilation will keep you ready to bottom, while the contractions will keep the muscles and skin in check. Dr. Goldstein’s protocol allows for risk and injury prevention, as well as pleasurable engagement, alone or with others.

When your anus stretches, the ring of muscle known as the sphincter opens. If it stretches further than the anal tissue is accustomed to, the tissue may tear, causing an anal fissure. This can happen during a hard bowel movement or rough intercourse, causing discomfort and occasionally bleeding. By training anal tissue with our dilator protocol, you can let your anal musculature grow accustomed to opening and closing consciously.

If you’re following our dilator protocol above, your anus should be stretched as much as needed. For those who want to maintain an optimally tight anus, one that is able to stretch enough to comfortably enjoy anal sex without losing pleasurable sensations (e.g. becoming too loose), then check out our Guide to Kegel Exercises for Men.

On days you’re not engaging in anal play or training anal tissue with our dilator protocol, try relaxing your abdomen then squeezing just your anus and pelvic floor muscles as if you were trying to stop urinating for about five to 10 seconds. Repeat that about five times a day.